The Dark I Know Well
by broadwaybaby4205
Summary: ONESHOT! "Ilse was the one person who always understood him. He partly believed it was because she had suffered a great deal more than he had." Includes a flashback. Pairing: MoritzIlse.


**Author's Note: So I recently discovered Spring Awakening and I totally love it! I've been obsessively listening to the songs/watching YouTube clips. I haven't seen it live but I want to really badly! Anyhow, this is Moritz/Ilse, my favorite Spring Awakening couple, and I hope you enjoy it! I haven't read any of the Spring Awakening fanfics, so I have no idea if this idea is terribly overused. If it is, I'm very sorry. Flashbacks are italicized. Review please! :)**

**Disclaimer: If I owned Spring Awakening I would have seen it live already. **

"Goodnight Ilse," Melchior muttered.

He didn't have any other options. Anywhere else to go. Anything left to do.

"Goodnight?" Ilse replied, a bit of question in her voice.

"Virgil – the equations…remember?" Moritz reminded.

"Just for an hour," Ilse begged.

She was so alone. So completely alone. And it was so good to see him. It was safe to say that Moritz was the best friend she ever had. Not to mention one of the only ones.

"I can't," his voice cracking as tears welled up in chocolate colored eyes.

He quickly looked the other way so she wouldn't notice.

"Walk me at least," Ilse pleaded, her own eyes beginning to water.

She needed someone. Anyone.

"Honestly. I wish I could," Moritz responded truthfully, as Ilse looked at him, confusion in her eyes.

"You know, by the time you finally wake up, I'll be lying on some trash heap," Ilse bitterly responded, sadness laced in her sultry voice as she walked off, leaving Moritz alone with his thoughts and his tears.

Moritz wished with all of his heart he had said yes. If only he had. He was going to kill himself. Of that he was absolutely certain. But he wanted to have sex once before he died. At the very least once. And he wanted to do it with her more than anyone. Ilse was the one person who always understood him. He partly believed it was because she had suffered a great deal more than he had.

"_Moritz! Hurry up!" a nine-year-old Ilse giggled as she ran toward her doorstep, her friend in close pursuit. _

"_I'm coming!" he responded sprinting toward her and finally arriving at the doorstep with her._

"_Come inside!" she insisted, "We can play house!"_

"_I don't wanna play house," Moritz complained._

"_Ooo, I know! How about pirates?" Ilse suggested, flashing her small white teeth in excitement._

"_Alright," Moritz smirked as the two entered the house._

"_Let's go in my room," Ilse whispered as she headed toward the back of the house, "Melchior and Wendla should be here soon."_

"_Okay," Moritz agreed, following her into her tiny room._

_She flounced over to the small bed in the corner and stood up._

"_I want your gold!" she declared, giving her best pirate impression, "Give it to me!"_

"_No! I just sacked a city for this! Why would I want to give it to you?" Moritz questioned._

"_Because! I have a sword!" Ilse decided, pretending to corner him with a sword._

"_No you don't," Moritz stated as if it were the most obvious thing in the world._

"_We're pretending!" Ilse reminded._

"_But still," he insisted._

"_Fine," she pouted, picked up a pencil and holding it out at him, "I have a sword! You're unarmed! Now hand over the gold!"_

"_Much better," Moritz smiled, earning him a glare from Ilse, "I mean, no! You're not getting it I tell you!"_

_Moritz ran from one side of her room to the other, but Ilse dropped the sword and tackled him, her small body landing on his as the two friends erupted into a fit of giggles. _

"_What's that?" Moritz inquired, pointing out a violet bruise on her tiny arm._

"_Oh, nothing," Ilse insisted._

"_Come on, you can tell me," Moritz begged._

"_No," Ilse pressed._

"_I won't tell anyone," Moritz promised._

"_You swear?" Ilse probed, her small brows creasing._

"_I do," Moritz swore._

"_Well, it's just sometimes when my daddy gets mad at me he hits me. He does other things too. But, anyway, this one's from last week. I came home from school late because Wendla and I were playing over at her house. He got really mad and shoved me onto the floor. I landed on my arm," Ilse told him._

"_That's not fair. Why would he do that? You shouldn't let him. You should tell someone. Like an adult," Moritz suggested._

"_I dunno. Maybe," Ilse pondered._

"_I'm sorry though," Moritz stated, hugging his friend._

"_We're here," Wendla announced with a smile as she swung open Ilse's bedroom door, Melchior in close pursuit._

"For the love of God," Moritz lamented to himself, "All I had to do was say 'yes'. Ilse! Ilse!"

He ran in the direction in which she had left, hoping to find her still there. Sadly that was not the case. It wasn't like he was going to try and find her now. It was completely useless.

That was it. Moritz sighed. Everything was a mess. He was failing schools. His dad hated him. He had no reason left to live.

He was ready now.

**A/N: Review please! I would really appreciate it. :)**


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